Well errbody wunnered whut happen to me over da summer, well here's the answer! If anybody no how to clear up alien jizz, lemme know. Dems sum unsanitary fuckers…SMH Whoo! Seesum 5, Bitchez!
Well maybe ima lil late to the pardee but here is my vidja an my commetary on the subjeck. Maybe dem hate ledders will stop a-comin. Ah who the hell am i kiddin...
Lawd, jess whenya thot it wuz saf ta go ouside agin. Purty soon we's all gone haveta ware body condums, an yall nows what i thank on et subjeck. I becha the guvmint invenned this shit like the aids thang.
Wayull wunce agin i gotta have my hollerday show innerupted by sum kinda crazy sidetrakked dramuh. I gotta get Miss Cleo over here an ghosebusser deez heifers outta me far good. Ima half midget sexDreems for life now. =(
Lissen, if ya don't vote, u kant bitch, K? I always make shur and vote but hell ima bitch either way, & u kno I'm rite. I thank solve ar voter machine prollems in diss HISI, but i can't member…SMH y'all.
I memmer back wen Nikulodion had edjacayshunul stuf on et an now they parently jess teechin yungin gals how to be KimKardashern-like tenshun hores. Seems dey crown demselves a new Queen Idgit. Now Armyana & Miss Frankie gotta fites over the crown. HEH!
Wayull…I been tiptoen around this subjeck fur a while but iss time 2 open up & letchall in on wun of the reesums Im such a hardass now. Lemme jess say next sumbich what puts his hand on me, gone end up in a pine box. Caprice?
Cops used 2 be a profeshun yoo was sposed ta look up to an truss, but nowadays theys usually the emeny cuz they power-hungrey & crookit & workin wiff da mob & keeping racism alive. Thar needa be a law sayin yoo ken fites back wiff cops cuz I aint getting beet like no Rodney king iont care whut kinda badge u got!!!
It beginning to look a lot like et time a’year when people only nice cuz, well…iss thet time a’year. Iss time us nontradishnalists got ar own speshul day, caprice? Jingle Jangle, sends me sum goddamn beer munny or ima go shoot sum raindeer, k?
Yoo memmer dem Mr. Yuk stickurs what we used ta put on poisum bottles. Et need to be the noo logo for deez Moonsompo muthafuckas. I hope they all gits put in jale. Et'd mak me heppy.
Surprize Sueprize…Lo gone & dun a hole show on sumthin yungin related, well..sumbody hadda do sumthin dontchu thank. Sides, iffin I help the wurl get helfy, den everbody is hotter & et meens mor hungins fur me cuz when yoo lose weight u gain a pecker inch, so looks like I win in the end ennyway! TAADAAAAA!
Lawwwwd thangs people wont do fur atenchun deez days. Yoo muss got low self asteam to be putting holes in yur body, what ar u, a Cutter who like to accessurize? Deez people wiff that eerlobe thangs, I kant even maintame eyecontack wiff any uv um. #Gross
Well theynt jenny harts out thar as frozum as mine, so NN Sisser Elsie, i knows how yew feels. Hey maybe i be poplar snuff to be a karakter on the seekul. Hell i aint cleenin up far disneey ar nobody lessen theys 7-digits involved.
Hey all u pilferin mofos out thar robbin stores an settin far to people cars on the streets just to proof yur point, yew goddamn stoop. Get a job wiff that ignurntness. Plenny ways to proof yur point wiffout bein idgits about it!
Jeepers creepers who knowed tha prise a fame was so steep. I dun been reckanized three times diss munth at the bolin alley. Course, two them times was frum this unnerground porno I did back in the day, but oh-well. Dang gonna have reel life stalkers soon!
Now cum on CBS, if yew was gonna faller the misadvenchers uv any duo in the wurld out thar, who else wood be more ennertainin sides me en my drag queen Samoer here?!? NOBODY! So hopefully sumbody castin agent see us and wanna give us a shot at that mill!
Im bout sickin tard uv herein diss sexul ornamentation is a choice. When u choose to be str8 huh? Can’t answer? There u have it then! It AINT! Im glad the yungins isn’t as ignurtnt as they parents on this subjeck. If I was gone adopt, I’d only adopt them throwaway gays, they daserve a famalee most!
So lass week everbody got valleytime cards an luv ledders an shit, well u know what I got? Buncha damn hates mail, what else be new. Frum flat-chessed bitchez no doubt. Haters only hate cuz they hate they own shitfilled life! Caprice?
Hey hey hey! Yew better start warchin out far sleepin pills in yur puddin pops far Cosby fonnle yur tiddies. Man,don’t it seem funny all deez womens got similar stories like them whats been adducted by the aliens does. Aw shit…is Bill Cozzy an alium?
I kinda miss life befor tha innernets, now damn nerds with their puters thank they run the wurld. Hell ima start keeping my munny in a sock drawer cuz wiff all dem security breeches, who noze what is safe an sacred no more!
Furss off, yew all oposin people wantin to check our wiff dignity needa ask yourself if you’d trade places wiff diss sufffererr. Huh? Does I heer crikits? Yeah, thots so. STFU & MYFOB. Peace be wiff doze who strugglin’!
I sware 2 gods nexx persum who post fake shit and have a freek out, ima go to yur house and sucker punch yew. Lissin, if its SHOCK VALYOO news hedline and it aint from a reputable news agensy, it prolly aint troo! Gitcher hed outcher ass!!!
Theys so menny prollems in the wurld what can be trased back to that moment in hissury when we stopped spankin ar lil-uns it aint even funny! We razin a genrayshun uv pussies, ets why I aint got none, I aint beein part of the prollem. Obviously, Im tryin’ to fix shit instead!
That dang TLC channel damn neer unwarchable wiff all the boolshit they call ennertanement! Should be callt The Looser Channul! Cuz it feecher loosers and is warched by LOOSERS! Lawd thet Momma Dugger pussy muss look like a jellyfish by now.
Diss religuss freedum BS gone too far. TOO FAR I SAY! Diss country spose to treet all iss people like equuls b ut less be fare, that aint never happin in all its 200 plus yeers. Ets why we needa vote librul so the Pullicuns cant drag us back to the dark ages!
I thank any wumun what don’t vote fur fare wages totes deserv her 80 cents on the dollar, but not diss heffer! Ets why Ima proud soshaliss, id rather pay into the syssem and leave a fare and better wurld. All I needs is beer munny ennyway. Or free beer…yeah…beer shoos be free iffin the Bill-a-rites garantees me happiness!
Not I’m equally split on diss issue heer. Thar needa been safety in place fur ar peoples b ut they also gone need ways outta it. Tax brakes fur cumpnies helping to git people off assistance is good start.
Yall no dem fatties what don’t know why they so fat, sittem down and make em warch diss. Lern yur ass sumthin bout how the guvurment is poisonin us jess to make munny off shugur industry! I may not be the picher a helf, but at lease I’s skinny.
Copycat youtoobers jess steelin frum eech uther and reuplodin make me sick. Be orijunul ya asswipes! & stop given Kylie Jemmer attenshun, she aint dun nuffin wurthy. Yall doin these chellinges like lemmings piss me off ta no end tooooo!
Maybe iffin u stop & understand why fokes riot an protess and step outside yur lily-white pickit fence life & see how fokes on uther side gits treated, yew can see the need for civil unressts. dumbasses
Now lissin all yall baby-sympathizers out thar. Not errbody gotta like yunging, K? So stop bullyin me wiff hates male sayin that Ize gonna git mine sumday. Kidz is stoop anna wasta munny an Im glad aint never had tadeel wiff wun. Furbabies is better cuz lease they shit outside.
Yoo cant judge no book by they cuvur an same goes fur peeples. Did yall no that they is white people in Afferka? Blows my damn mine man. I cant wait til all are races is mixed and we all trangennered, then maybe we stop bein assholes bout ar differnces.
While J.C. digests the news of having another son, Keysha is shocked with the return of her estranged husband, Xavier; meanwhile, a dead body is found.
Keysha continues to adjust to Xavier being back home; meanwhile, as Ryan tries to move on, J.C. hits a nerve with Ashley when he tries to include Tiffany and Micah in their lives.
The Lyons family says goodbye to another family member; meanwhile, Ashley makes a bold move.
J.C. figures out what to do after Ashley abandons their baby; meanwhile, Ryan is hiding Delilah's return from Bobbi.
Sherri continues to try and mend her relationship with Noah and Jonah while she finally confronts Malcolm; meanwhile, a confession is made.
Both Raven and Tammi are dealing with the aftermath of Charles' death now that Eric's murder case has come to an end; meanwhile, as one relationship comes to an end, another one begins.
Kiera and Malcolm's relationship is exposed; meanwhile, Nigel tries his hands at being a "father-figure" to Noah and Jonah.
Vincent makes a surprise return for Jonah's birthday party, but things take a turn for the worse when old feelings return; meanwhile, Sean makes a move.
Sean travels to Virginia to visit his birth mother, and he ends up meeting his half-brothers as well.
Shayquan has another encounter with Phylicia as her relationship with Joshua comes to a head; meanwhile, another familiar face returns to Augusta.
All the Lyons siblings come together for a shocking revelation.
As Ryan returns to an old love, Raven and J.C. decide to take the next step in their lives as they prepare for the next chapter; meanwhile, Keysha gets an unpleasant surprise from Malcolm.
Keysha must decide what's next for her while her siblings are moving on with their lives.
In the season 5 premiere, the Jones and Carter families deal with the aftermath of Carl's heart attack; meanwhile, as Fred and Nya seem to be moving forward, Brandon is stuck in the past after Raquel's shocking announcement.
Melinda, CJ, Bredna, Julius, and Donavan gather together for Carl's will reading; meanwhile, as Brandon tries to keep things together after Raquel's shocking news, Pastor Richard Brooks tries to save his marriage after it is revealed that he is Dominique's long lost father.
CJ and Ashley must deal with the guilt of their night of passion while trying to hide the truth from Dominique; meanwhile, Brandon must come face to face with the consequences of having an affair with Raquel.
Donavan confronts Raquel to tell the truth about her pregnancy; meanwhile, Dominique must deal with the truth that Ashley and CJ had sex.